Penny for your thoughts...

I learned the other day that it costs the US Mint over 2 cents to crank out a penny. Now, I'm no mathematician, but that seems less than cost-effective. So why do we still make more of them? Rich folks (who generally make all the rules) have no use for pennies anymore. Joe Average is annoyed by them. Most people, I'm guessing, would no longer bother to bend over and pick one up, should they happen upon it on the street. I'll go so far as to speculate that a homeless person living in a cardboard box would turn down an offer of pennies. How many of us have a coffee can - or perhaps some larger container - taking up space in our home, chock full o' pennies, that we just wish would go away. Even most banks don't want them - less and less banks are willing to count change these days, and when it comes to pennies, I can't blame them. Nobody likes 'em, with the possible exception of numismatists (and who cares what they like, anyway?). Other than shoving a couple in one's loafers, or using one to test the tread depth on a car tire, they're bordering on being useless. So please, for the love of money, can't we just use common sense and stop making these common cents already? That's my two cents, which should probably be about a buck and a half, adjusted for inflation.

Justice for the downtrodden female tennis stars of Wimbledon, at last

So, the fine folks at Wimbledon announced that they're finally going to pay the women the same prize money as the men now. Hallelujah! Good for them. Good for the already-ridiculously-overpaid female athletes, too - they're certainly entitled to equal pay for equal work. Why should the male winner walk off with a walloping $1.28 million, while the shortchanged female winner takes home just $1.22 million. Forgive me, but I'm finding it hard to well up over the sad state of affairs befalling athletes who clear more in a year than most of us make in a lifetime. But hey, fair is fair. Equal work - equal pay.

Just one thing: I believe that the women need to start playing 5-set matches, just like the men. Tit for tat, if you will. Look, it wasn't all that long ago that common belief was that a woman could never compete against a man on the tennis court. Billie Jean King graciously proved otherwise. Now, today's athletes - both men and women - are in incredible physical condition, with trainers, coaches, and the best technology that their bloated wallets can afford. You can hardly say in good conscience that a female athlete in her late teens or early twenties can't handle a 5-set match. Why, to make such a claim would be tantamount to sexism! So, either pay those women equally to play as many sets as the men, or let the men play as few sets as the women. C'mon, fair is fair.

And, while we're talking sports for a moment, let me ask you this: Why is it that when our top American teams play their final game of the season, the winner is dubbed "World Champion"? If our championships only involve American teams, then this is a rather pompous, arrogant, and unsupported claim, isn't it? Contrary to that toe-tapping song from a charity concert of some years ago, "We are not the world." Just don't tell that to the president. Good night, and good seats.